Science says these 7 parenting beliefs may be quietly making life harder for parents and children

June 29, 2026 - 10:41

Every parent wants to give their child the best possible upbringing. But in trying to be the "perfect parent," many may be putting unnecessary pressure on themselves. A 2023 survey of more than 700 parents by researchers at Ohio State University found that 57% reported experiencing parental burnout. Surprisingly, the biggest predictor wasn't the number of children they had or how many hours they worked. It was the pressure to live up to an impossible standard of parenting.

Child development experts say many of the beliefs parents consider signs of "good parenting" may actually be making life harder for both parents and children. Here is what science says about seven common parenting beliefs that may be quietly working against everyone involved.

First, the idea that children must always be happy. Experts say this belief leads parents to constantly entertain or rescue their kids from frustration. In reality, children need to experience boredom and disappointment to build resilience. Trying to prevent all negative feelings robs them of that growth.

Second, the belief that parents should never say no. Saying yes too often can create a sense of entitlement and make children less able to handle limits later in life. A firm but kind no teaches boundaries.

Third, the pressure to be a "fun" parent all the time. While fun is important, children also need structure, routine, and sometimes boring chores. Constant fun can exhaust parents and leave kids expecting nonstop stimulation.

Fourth, the idea that screen time is always bad. Research shows that not all screen time is equal. High-quality educational content can be beneficial. Banning screens entirely can lead to secrecy and shame around technology.

Fifth, the belief that a parent's job is to fix every problem. When parents jump in to solve every issue, children miss the chance to develop problem-solving skills. Letting kids struggle a little builds competence.

Sixth, the pressure to be consistent 100% of the time. No parent can be perfectly consistent. Experts say that occasional inconsistency is normal and that children can adapt. Trying to be perfect leads to burnout.

Seventh, the idea that a parent's worth is tied to their child's achievements. This belief creates anxiety for both parent and child. Children feel they must perform to earn love, and parents feel their value rises and falls with report cards or trophies.

The takeaway is simple. Letting go of these rigid beliefs can reduce parental burnout and help children grow into more resilient, independent people.